Create Love for Yourself
I went through a pretty rough breakup a while ago and I needed some sort of repetition of healthy habits to focus on in my life. I started listening to a bunch of amazing podcasts. My favorite is the Unspoken Podcast! It’s amazing and makes you feel all the feels! I started reading more and enjoying getting lost in books. Just finished The Celestine Prophecy which I also highly recommend. And I started watching insightful videos on YouTube like Tedtalks and travel videos to inspire my creativity and passions. This was all just the beginning of my self love journey. Doing these habits surrounded me with the information of the importance of self love. Everything stems from it! When you have self love for yourself you have respect for yourself, you believe yourself to be beautiful and attractive, you believe that you can accomplish whatever you set your mind too! And when you feel that way about yourself it radiates off of you! You start running into people that also feel that way about themselves and those people become your soul family. When I was the lowest I’ve ever been and thought so negatively about myself, I had a lot of really fake friends but only becuase I was fake! I was trying to be the person I thought they wanted me to be! The friendships I have now are all so genuine and wonderful. We all act our complete and honest selves and we are all so supportive of that! I love the feeling of being my true honest self and not receiving judgment! But again, that all starts with you. Having the courage to be your true self and be silly and weird with someone else is a gift. Accepting your faults and accepting you are not a perfect human. You are who you surround yourself with.
My new habits include meditating/praying in the mornings (preferably) outside and listening to the Earth, sitting in front of a mirror and speaking love to myself about my body, taking care of my health by paying attention to what I’m eating and drinking. Making sure I’m moving my body and getting outside for hikes as often as possible. When I go on hikes I am outside of my element, I feel released from my mind because all I think about is being present with the Earth and walking. All my troubles go away and it’s just peace. But hiking might not be for everyone. Find something that gives you that peace and happiness and do it. Look at yourself in a mirror and say I love you, you are wonderful and I’m so happy with who I am. Do that everyday and something will start changing in your brain. Your insecurities will start to melt away. Your relationships will start changing for the better.
If anyone on your journey is making you feel less of yourself and making it difficult to love yourself then maybe that needs to be cut off. And it doesn’t need to be drama, it can just be “we had our time together and now I think it’s time for us to go our separate ways.” Even is that means cutting off a 12 year relationship ,which I’ve had to do before and it sucks but you have to put you first.
Don’t jump into a relationship with someone unless you have that self love for yourself. There is this quote I love that I want to share before diving into this part:
The capacity to be alone is the capacity to love. It may look paradoxical to you, but it's not. It is an existential truth: only those people who are capable of being alone are capable of love, of sharing, of going into the deepest core of another person--without possessing the other, without becoming dependent on the other, without reducing the other to a thing, and without becoming addicted to the other. They allow the other absolute freedom, because they know that if the other leaves, they will be as happy as they are now. Their happiness cannot be taken by the other, because it is not given by the other.
That quote is so incredibly powerful and true! You have to be able to be in a partnership with someone but also keep your independence and love for yourself. You can’t allow that person to become your world or your everything. I mean that’s a lot of pressure to put on someone, especially someone you love and want to be with forever. Like I said before, when you start loving yourself your insecurities will start to melt away. The insecurities like…”oh I hope he’s not with another girl”, “I better put my makeup on before he wakes up”, “I don’t want you to be friends with other girls”. You worry he’s with another girl because you think your not good enough for him, you need to put makeup on before he wakes up because your afraid he won’t accept the real you, your don’t want him to be friends with other females because you feel threatened. It all comes from insecurities within your own self.
The reason I wanted to create this post was to encourage you to start taking the steps to self love and healing. It’s not going to happen overnight but it will happen! Take time out of your week to just be with yourself. You are amazing as you are! You just haven’t realized it yet. Much love to you all!
